today is a day of waiting.

actually, even right now, im waiting for something.

for one.. its america's next top model finale!! altho i know who the winner is, its still exciting. cant wait to see that. count down. 1 hour to go.

and after an hour and a half, another korean drama that i like will show in kbs world. very excited too.

also waiting for a call for practicum. KILLING ME.

also waiting for my visa. taking FOREVER. SO STRESSED.  

also waiting for the release of my grades. heart pounding. nervous. worried. excited.

hay~ they say if you want to give hell to another person, make that person wait. hmmmm. guess im in hell right now. huhuhu

Anyway, havent blogd in so long! i was seriously considering getting rid of my blog. haha since im too freaking lazy to update it. haha

so, quick update:

i cut my hair. its kind of short. well not really. haha but feels hella lighter. after researching (yes, seriously) for months for the best salons to go to, i ended up cutting my hair at home by my personal hair stylist my sis. well, she cut my hair like 3 times already before so i trust her skills. believe me, she's better than most hair stylists out there! So that's done.

i also now have a fantabulous digi cam. the conon ixus 60! o~yeah! super camera whoring 24/7.

Went to this recollection from our temple for the youth. (yes, as in the buddhist temple. yes, im a buddhist) First, it was out of duty cz my mom practically ordered me and my sis to go. But, (wow, cant blive il say this), i really had fun. I dont really hang out with koreans but thankfully the ppl there were all good kids. (kids bec most of them were younger than me-->sign that im OLDDDDDDDDDD, but not the oldest.haha) and the three oppas and one unnie were really nice, super funny and cool too. and as expected, we played all those corny korean games! hahaha and i was good at it. except the fry pan game and the 3-6-9 game. It was held in this resort in laguna. it was a good getaway.

oh yeah.. and tiesto! how could i forget. it was amaizing. lights, the people, everything. except the part i got so drunk later that i dont even remember tiesto playing the remix of Empty Streets. Ugh. And the morning after sucked too. haha but over all. GREAT PARTY. DJ TIESTO RULES.

 HAY... i need some good news to lift my spirits up. i hate waiting.

It's funny how we all wish to be somewhere else other than where we are. That's me.   It's not that i want to be away from home.. I just feel the need to get away and pursue my dream. I know my distant future isnt here. Maybe my heart wont feel like rushing so much when things will start to happen..  I cant wait to hear the news that i got the internship. For now, that is the next step. I'm going to have a meeting with a company in phil stock exchange center on Friday. I know I'll do well. I just hope it will be full of good news like... a cute boss or a high pay. (hahahahaha) SIGH. I just cant take my mind off the other places i submitted my resumes in. I know i should think positive. Think Positive. i WILL get the job. I will.

i have all these plans, what i will do and what i'll do next. Eventually. London. Yes. oh and for some weird REALLY WEIRD reason, ive always had a feeling that ill marry an English gentleman. REALLY. (haha. i know it's funny right? but what can i say, that has always been my intuition)  Or im just putting that thought into my head. haha

ahhh! school is gna end in a few weeks! cant wait... still havent heard from any of the places i submitted my resume.. althou they did say they'll announce by mid march. yikes.. wat if! okay, i wont go there. but, unexpectedly, i got a call from this company that i didnt submit my resume. im already going for the interview. hope they pay me alot. hahahaha hope it can count as my practicum.. but i duno. i hope get accepted in Summit media or Meg. hay.

 ps. KAYE! you shut down you blog site??? y??? anyway, update me what happend with that guy.

ahhhhhhhhh scary...........

 to be continued...

When your tears fall, just let it flow

Tears are but inevitable in love

So love him, even his pains.. for that one true love

Today, i woke up with the most magical sound in the world. With my eyes still closed, and my mind still drifting back and forth from my reality to my dreams, the lyrical sound of the leaves swaying together with the wind glided in through my windows. And ever so gently... the cool wind touched my cheeks like a soft morning kiss from heaven. It felt like i was transported to a paradise.. white soft sand, clear blue sky, warm sunlight and cool nights. I wanted that blissful moment to be forever. I just loved it. The great news is, this perfect weather will most likely last for the next few months.

As i was just surfing around, i read these words:

something wonderful's gonna happen soon... i can tell.. its in the air =)

I hope you're right. Something wonderful... hmmm Just saying those words does make you smile. It's funny. Makes you feel weird inside.. sort of bitter sweet. You dont exactly know what it is. I guess Christmas is really in the air. Even time doesnt feel the same.. every second feels like a moment to reflect. At least for this time of the year, you want to believe something wonderful can happen to you. You want to hope and dream...

Amidst all these emotions, i also feel so bitter like an immature child who wants to throw a fit and whine. 2005 went by just too quickly. I JUST turned 20 (well.. not EXACTLY just turned 20 but..) I just dont remember much.. It's been a whole year and as i look back, feels like only a month's worth of memories. So unfair. I'm afraid that in about a few years, i wont remember anything anymore...

According to Xander's 30-ish friend, the best years of your life is when you're in your 20's. and it flies by so quickly. Well.. according to Sex and the City.. its NOT!. HAHA... That's just me trying to make myself feel better. But i guess, it has to be your 20's. Right? Or not! Oh.. I dont know. Anyway, technically, ive just started the "time of my life" or I've already experieced 1 year of that "best years" ill ever have.. So the despair! Oh.. the dramas of life.. Drama drama drama.. Not that im not happy. As Dr. G said... oh.. the unhappiness of the happy person. I am literally feeling the chill even from the Tropics.

La Vraie vie est ailleurs -Arthur Rimbaud

The true life is absent .. Yes, indeed.

Merry Christmas everyone!  Is it too early for this? No, right? hehe i decided to update since i have some time to kill.. I'm in school so i better take abvantage of the internet here. haha I've just been too lazy to connect to the Internet for past few weeks. SO there...

Oh yeah, our fantabulous Christmas tree is up! The decors are not quite done but.. its really prettttty. im so happy. Now, i have to buy gifts so i can put them under the tree. heheheh i really feel like a kid.. its been so long since ive felt this excited over something. hahahah NOW.. all i can see it christmas decors! ahahhah Whenever i see christmas decors at the mall, i want to buy them! haha Anyway... before all the jolly jolly thoughts, ill have to finish school stuff.. papers. It's soooo unfair. My sister's christmas break starts on the 13th and mine starts on the 20th!!! UNFAIR.... huhuhuhu.. but.... im sort of excited to start my feature paper (explanatory essay) on contact lenses. hahaha Well.. do you know how it works? how.. it just stays on our eyes and not move around in there? How we dont feel a thing? Seeee~ we really dont know about the simple things that are part of our life now. haha

oh! yeah.. new discovery. haha Well forgive me if you're one of those who parties every weekend but i dont anymore so i just found out about this. hehe Last sat, we went to Embassy cuisine and i never knew it was soooo nice there! i swear! i like it more than M now cz of the music and the crowd. My god.. can i just say most of the guys there were really really good looking. man~ All this time.. ive just been going to Embassy (aka Embash*t. hahaha) .. i should have just hung out in Embassy cuisine! It never occured to me to check that place out when its just beside Embassy! It's so posh in there. really. i loved it! (but still love the drinks in M) All i could say was..woah~ its so sex and the city! Plus, the ambiance was so fab. When you enter, the first thing you'll notice is this mini "cat walk" where the floors are transparent. It's glass and you can see right  through it. You feel like your floating or something. Its divided into first floor and second floor and we stayed in the second floor. The interior decoration was cozy yet chic with transparent crystal looking plastic chairs and long beige couches where you can lie down and on some corners, there were really elegant tables and seats fit for fine dining. It's almost so relaxed but it's so happening with great music! They were playing lots of bonnie bailey and smooth trance. and did i mention the good looking people (especially the men)? oh yeah.. i did! hahahah or, maybe it was just a good night. (note to min: there was this guy who looked like daniel henney!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) omigod. ha! it was such a fun night. I am soooo going back.  So now, you know where to find me. hahahah

Chao!

I was giving out daily homeworks for my student as usual... So i wrote:

Homework   10/   11/1/05    Tuesday

Talking to myself in the head: Wow, freaking November already.

I check my phone to be sure. Yeah. It is November.

It just hit me so hard.. wow. It's already November! Believe it or not, im the person who still finds it amazing that it's 2005. the year 2000 feels like yesterday to me. I know what your thinking but i just cant help it. Time does feel like it's whizzing by me. So now, the more i feel like i should be doing something. Something meaningful.. fulfilling. Like go out there and start something.

I was so bored out of my wits yesterday after i got home from teaching and so i plopd in "The View From the Top" dvd. I'm pretty sure being a flight attendant is not my calling but everytime i watch this movie, i feel so inspired and just happy. hihi I guess i just really like the idea that she did achieve her dream "Paris... First Class... International"  AND the fact that later, she became a pilot. SO cool. haha i know i know. I just love these "achieving your dream" kind of corny movies as much as i like those cheezy romantic comedies with happy happy endings. I just like it okay. I'm like all "go~ girl" type. So the point is... there's this scene in the movie that has always stayed on my head..  The first activity in the training program was when Mike Myers's character asked all the trainees to stand up and look under a table. When all the them looked under their chairs, they found a dollar bill. The point of the short short activity? You have to literally get off you ass to earn a buck. haha but see.. that's so clever and so true. nothing comes easy in life. So... Shouldnt i be getting off my ass to actually do something? And there was a scene wen she just got dumped by her stupid hs quarterback-turned-into-grocery-store-manager-loser-ass-of-a-boyfriend, and she's of course all devastated. He actually told her that she'll never get out of the small town and be somebody. So to prove him wrong, she decides to persue her dream. She actually starts out at this really sucky airline where drunks and gamblers ride. Not to mention, she had to wear the tacky-hooker-ish uniform. with big hair.  And i remember her saying with a big sigh.. "well, a girl's gotta start somewhere"

Where do i begin? Where do i start? I guess il just have to move my heavy ass and do something. ahhhh~~ sigh. Breaks always makes me restless. God, im a freak for saying this but i like it when im busy.  ahhhh yuck. i know. okay.. maybe it's just an excuse since if im busy.. i dont really get to think of all the little things. You know.. all the problems.. Hay.. the reality is, a break that's for a week is fine already. If it gets longer than that?? Well, lets just say i have too much time to THINK. Not that it's all bad... You do get something out of thinking.. and thinking.. and thinking. haha

I was watching this Korean drama called "Lovers in Prague" like weeks ago and i realized i really really want to go to europe. Travel.. see the world. Maybe live in Italy or something. Or stay in London.. Paris maybe? (Ps. Super want to learn French. It's a promise to myself. I will learn French) Visit Africa... India.. Spain. I really want to get out of here after i graduate. Of course it will all depend on different factors..things~ circumstances.. situations.. yada yada yada.. hmmm Maybe my mind will change. I know i wont be able to do it right after i graduate for obvious reasons but i hope one day and someday.. I'll get to do just that.